A Saree, a Shirt, and a Patriarchal World

When Dorothy first came out, all the controversy surrounding it could be stripped down to one question: “Would you understand the pain only if you had a child who was gay or transgender?” It’s easy to support the LGBTQ+ community when it doesn’t hit close to home.

Between reading everyone’s views on Dorothy and actually watching the movie for myself, I’ve had a lot of time to ponder this. The idea of somebody “turning” gay is what all these arguments seem to miss. And it certainly doesn’t happen by watching a queer movie.

If your child were queer, wouldn’t you, as a parent, be among the first to know? Your child doesn’t have to come out and say it. You would still know, somewhere in your heart, that they are struggling to identify with the norms associated with their gender and bottling up their emotions out of fear of rejection. You would see them try so hard to suppress their feelings just to fit in, to belong, and to avoid disrupting the status quo. You might see them lose friends and relatives over their identity. And when every safe space in the world vanishes, how can a parent not understand that they need to be that one safe space for their child, no matter how old they grow?

Subbu’s home is the complete antithesis of a safe space. It is a place that asks him to “man up” when he is still barely a child. A place that devoured his sister for choosing for herself, and a place that leaves no room for a mother grieving the loss of her daughter.

Subbu keeps searching for a safe space, knowing that he will never find it at home. He searches for it with his friends at school and later, when Karthi enters his life. He knows right away that Karthi will protect him at any cost. But will their friendship survive his truth?

A younger Subbu would have asked Karthi to man up and stop crying during an altercation at school. It is an idea peddled by his father and brother, who associate masculinity with aggression, violence, rooster fights, and never showing emotion. Eventually, Karthi becomes the one who constantly asks Subbu to “man up” whenever he cries or shows his emotions.

But every woman in Subbu’s life is able to see his truth and accept him for who he is, without questioning his masculinity. They recognise the softness beneath his macho outlook. Karthi’s mom, for instance, instantly sees a child who has been forced to grow up too soon and recognises his longing for a maternal figure in his life. Dhanalakshmi knows how to handle a vulnerable Subbu and help him let his feelings out. And finally, there is Dorothy, the feminine presence he has longed for at home. She reassures him that his feelings are valid and shows him a way forward.

Which is why, when Dorothy is killed, it becomes the final straw in his relationship with his father, his brothers, and the home he has known. He no longer cares about their disapproval. He could have easily run away without them ever knowing. But instead, he chooses to make a statement. He wears a saree and walks out as a proud woman, carrying with him the blessings of Dorothy, his mother, and his sister.

Despite being his closest friend, Karthi is the one person who has never truly understood Subbu’s feelings. And that is not because Karthi is tone-deaf. He is simply conditioned to see things a certain way, and Subbu has become so accustomed to being what Karthi wants him to be: a man. He learns to suppress his innate nature and mimic the ways of his brothers and Karthi. Throughout the movie, we see him slip in and out of his true self.

He leaves home wearing a saree, but when Karthi asks him to change into a shirt, he does so without hesitation. Because Karthi is the man he loves, and being the person Karthi wants him to be matters more to him in that moment. But with every conversation during their journey, it becomes increasingly clear to Karthi that the Subbu he thought he knew no longer exists. He is reluctant to see her enjoy the journey, singing and dancing. But by the end, he realises, almost to his own surprise, that he had failed to see that Subbu was a woman all along.

We often see people question why trans women are, in their words, “too feminine.” Cisgender women are accepted as women even when they are less feminine or wear unisex clothing. Trans women, on the other hand, are rarely afforded the same liberty.

I also kept wondering why the lead characters were named Karthik and Subbu. It’s not uncommon for filmmakers to use their own names in their work, and considering this is certainly a landmark film in his directorial career, that could make sense. But we also see names being used to ridicule people in real life who share them. We’ve seen what happened to names like Shakeela and Pushpa. If any ridicule came his way because of homophobic individuals, Karthik Subbaraj took that burden upon himself rather than let someone else bear it.

I’m probably the last to join the Dorothy fan club, but what a joy it is to witness so many people showering love on a movie that smashes patriarchy so hard. Karthik Subbaraj keeps redefining what constitutes mainstream cinema with every film of his.